Hong Kong Food Poisoning, A Different Kind of 16th Birthday, a Rejected Visa Request and a Pneumothorax!

After I reached my 1 month mark and thought I was starting to gain some control of a new "normal" life here, I was reminded that control is not really what I need to seek! What I need to always remember is to just be IN THE MOMENT and if I am not in charge of what happens I am still in charge of how I handle what happens. 

We got through a typhoon.  Kinda exciting and figured I am really having some new experiences here!  Cut to next new experience...HK Food Poisoning!  Joe and I spent a wonderful afternoon in Stanley drinking Sangria and eating lunch on the water, watching locals perform for National Day (the China version of 4th of July), and wandering through the Stanley market.

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STANLEY MARKET...GREAT SHOPPING FOR USELESS STUFF AND SOUVENIRS.  CAN EVEN NEGOTIATE PRICES.

After this lovely afternoon, we headed home on the city bus.  It's about a 40 minute ride, narrow curvy streets and bumpy roads.  I thought I was getting motion sickness.  Wanted to get home and get off that bus real BAD!  I made it home but the next 30 hours made me regret my lunch selection! (I had tuna) No pictures to post for this lovely event.  Glad I got that out of the way and boy was I grateful and happy when I got to feel good again. 

Now it was time to think about Alex's 16th Birthday!  We were struggling with how to celebrate it because this is a big one!  I couldn't help but feel the distance and just how far away we were. Though we are building relationships and he is meeting a lot of new friends at school, we are still very new, and sharing this day without our close family and friends-who-are-like-family was going to be tough. PLUS, this is my son who came out of the womb talking about cars and trucks.  He said "loader" and "backhoe" before he said "mommy" and "daddy" and I know one of his biggest sacrifices in moving here was being able to drive at 16.  People say, "So let him drive in Hong Kong!" but 1st:  We don't have a car! 2nd: You can't drive until you are 18 here. 

I think we did okay.  The Sunday before his birthday we had a nice family day with the 3 of us.  We had foot and shoulder massages and pampered our boy (sorry, but he is always going to be my baby boy though I know 16 puts him in the young man category). On his Birth Day...we started with special birthday breakfast and ended with dinner out at Bombay Dreams for Indian food.  Weird, but my picky eater likes it!  He felt comfortable enough with a new friend to bring him along and it was a really good day.  Joe and I managed to find birthday wrap and a card but no candles or ribbon.  I put a tealight on his ice cream cake (made by mom).

B'DAY PAMPERING WITH THE AMAZING HK FOOT MASSAGE AND REFLEXOLOGY, HOT TEA AND SHOULDER MASSAGE.  90 MINUTES OF HEAVEN FOR ABOUT $40USD

ALEX'S 16TH BIRTHDAY DINNER WITH THEO AND MOM AND DAD.

So the birthday was bittersweet.  He got a lot of great messages through email and technology so he knew he was thought of but it also made us miss everyone.  Mail is so slow to arrive here that even the cards sent from Grandparents didn't arrive in time.  One was sent on the 28th and didn't get here until the 12th!  That Slow boat to China is  REALLY SLOW! Through it all Alex continues to amaze me with how much he is embracing this opportunity and experience.  He ended up finding out that he was going to be put on the traveling X Country team and he would have opportunites to travel to Mainland China and Guam for races.  Thus began visa applications and paperwork.  Living internationally is nothing if not paperwork intensive.  A lot of fun rules and regulations!  We scrambled to get him a multi entry visa to participate only to find out he was rejected because his passport expries in March.  Scramble again...going to consulate for passport issues.  Joe also made him a doctor appointment for vaccines to make sure all of that was in order.  Phew...this is a lot to think about all the time!  LOL! 

While all this is going on Alex has mentioned to us a few times that it hurts to breathe sometimes.  Well, there is constant smog here and we thought, much like when Joe and I were in college in LA, he was probably feeling the effects of that smog when he took deep breaths.  He runs for Cross Country, is still biking, and goes to the gym almost every single day so he didn't seem like he was sick.  Even his coach said running on a bad smog day is like smoking a pack of cigarettes so we were concerned but didn't think there was anything to do.  WRONG...PARENTS OF THE YEAR AWARD EARNED HERE!  Joe was taking Alex to the doctor for the shots so I said to the boys, "Make sure you mention that it hurts to breath."  Didn't really think anything of it, though. 

Next thing I know, Joe is texting that they are on their way to hospital for a possible pneumothorax, he needs an immediate x-ray, and they are putting an operating room on hold for him just in case.  WHAT?  HUH?  WHAT?  It's probably a good thing Joe was on duty for this one.  To make a long story a little bit shorter, he did have a pocket of air in his lung or lung sac...but it was small enough that they felt monitoring through x-ray was enough. It wasn't caused for any specific reason and tends to occur in tall, thin men. It would hopefully heal itself, the air would be reabsorbed and the lung would re-expand to normal. I guess now we don't have to worry about the visa being rejected! He's not going to be racing any time soon. We have bigger fish to fry!

We just went back for another x-ray on Sunday and it seems to be healing itself.  Another week of rest, no physical acitivity (which is torture for Alex), no PE or Cross Country, etc.  He is going to school but otherwise taking it easy.  I think he is going to be fine, especially since he already asked if he could go wakeboarding this weekend!  Note:  headshake and eye roll by me takes place here! 

So how's that for the first part of October in HK?  Not really any exciting stories of adventures and explorations in China, just stories of REAL LIFE.  I have proof that life happens no matter where you are or if you are ready to shake it up!  I wanted time to settle in, ease in to this new country...silly Tammy!  What if I just decided NOT to struggle? There will never come a time in life when you can say "I am done now." Each of us is a work in progress. What if I just allowed myself to BE okay with it all? Including being okay with the sad days when I'm homesick or the chaos I felt when they diagnosed Alex.  I tend to want to strangle life into submission.  But strangling doesn't allow for letting go.  Struggle allows me to feel but also let go, learn and embrace what life has to offer more gently...Yes? No? I'm working on it!

"We don't see things the way they are...we see things the way WE are."  Talmud

Typhoon Nasat

I survivied my first typhoon!  What have you been up to?


  IT'S GOING TO BE A STORMY DAY

On September 29th we awoke to find out we were in the midst of a Level 8 Typhoon!  We had gone to bed with warnings at Level 3 and had definitely heard the howling winds whistling in the night but we got up as usual to get Alex off to school and Joe off to work.  Alex takes Aspen out about 5:30am and since he is half asleep it didn't make him wonder when one of the guys at the guard stand was waving and motioning to him.  He just nodded and continued with his task.  Upon his return he saw the signs posted that we had been upgraded to Level 8.  A Level 10 is a direct hit!  Soon we were finding out just what this meant...schools were closed, buses and taxis were not running, and we were in for a new experience!  The buildings here are built to withstand this kind of weather so Joe tried to go down and get to work.  No luck!  If a taxi was willing to risk taking you, they were charging whatever they wanted. They were no longer running under any rules and regulations and just taking fares at their own risk because they were really not supposed to be taking fares. One of the parents of a friend of Alex's was able to get a taxi only to be returned back to home when they couldn't get to their destination because of the conditions.

THE WATERFALL GROWS!                                                                STORM CLOUDS

WE USUALLY SEE TONS OF SHIPS ON THESE WATERS...NOT TODAY. 

So, we had an unexpected day together and a new experience to share.  The winds were howling and there was rain but overall it was not a life-threatening, scarey situation.  I ended up breaking open a bottle of champagne to celebrate our first Typhoon.  We could watch the water and the storm from our house but it was not like what you would expect.  I took pictures but it is hard to capture wind!

THE WATER NEVER LOOKED
THAT CRAZY OR ROUGH.


 THE COAST GUARD WAS OUT TO PATROL.


Three different times Joe tried to go into work because his store was open and those who could get to work were part of a record-breaking day.  It turns out that all the people who couldn't get anywhere decided to shop.  All the ferries to Macau were canceled so there were a lot of people with a lot of nothing to do!

By late in the afternoon/early evening we were able to go outside and take Aspen for a walk.  Nothing was quite back to normal but the storm had definitely eased.  We could see a bit of the damage the winds had caused.

Mother Nature reminding us that she is still in charge! 

Our island escaped any real tragedies from this typhoon.  We later found out that it had been two years since a storm at this level had occured.   Considering we live on the 36th floor of a high rise, I must thank the engineers and builders who know what they are doing and kept us safe and comfortable.  I can cross this one off my "To Do" list!

4 Weeks Exactly!

It has been exactly 4 weeks to the day that I arrived in Hong Kong and became what I am now referred to as an expat.  I don't love the term because I believe I am a present and constant Windsor-ite, while simultaneously acknowledging that my day-to-day life is in Hong Kong.  It is official though.  Last week I went, all by myself, to pick up my Hong Kong ID.  Not a temporary one.  The real one with a bad picture and all my encrypted information and everything.  Just like my California Driver's License only this allows me to quickly go through immigration when I enter Hong Kong.  Like I'm a native, only giant sized with hips and boobs that are not normally seen in these parts!


I've had good days, great days, sad days, bad days, horrible days, laugh-out-loud days and this-would-be-great-if-all-my friends-could-join-me days.  Through it all there are a few things I know for sure:

*I am happy to have my marriage back.  The kind where I fall asleep next to Joe and wake up beside him and everything else is ok as long as we have that as a constant.

*I am savoring these next three years with Alex.  I can't believe Melanie is already off to college and I can't believe that chapter has ended.  I know our next chapter with her is going to be just as amazing but I am still missing my baby girl.  So, Alex, it's ON!  Let's make some memories.

*I AM NOT GOING TO HAVE CUTE HAIR HERE FOR MORE THAN TWO SECONDS.

*Hong Kong is a place of tremendous contradictions and contrasts...modern, contemporary architecture contrasting with no irrigation systems and one or two guys moving hoses around to water huge lawns and parks.

*I get so queasy on the double-decker buses here that I may become a taxi princess.  Swaying around narrow streets, narrow misses, and sudden stops don't make me feel so good.

*Pedestrians DON'T have the right of way here!

*My math skills are not so great.  Between calculating the value of HK$ versus US$, changing everything to the metric system, and figuring out military time, I am in a perpetual state of HUH????

*I forget what it feels like to be cold.

*I carry all my friends and family with me every moment of every day.

*The laughter of a child crosses all language and cultural barriers.  When you hear a child laughing or giggling, it makes you smile and you suddenly know that what matters most is universal. 

Here are some moments and memories from my past 4 weeks...

A TYPICAL HONG KONG STREET IN CENTRAL

WALKING AROUND AN AREA OF HK KNOWN AS CAUSEWAY BAY...

THERE ARE ALWAYS THIS MANY PEOPLE WHEN YOU ARE MAKING YOUR WAY AROUND...

WALKING THROUGH IFC MALL, ONE OF A MILLION HUGE MALLS HERE...

THE FIRST APPLE STORE IN HK OPENED AND THE CROWDS WERE EVEN WORSE THAN USUAL!

HEADING INTO THE MTR STATION (MASS TRANSIT RAILROAD).

GOING SOMEWHERE USUALLY ENTAILS A LOT OF WALKING, A SHUTTLE BUS, A MTR, A POSSIBLE MTR TRANSFER TO A NEW TRAIN, AND MAYBE A DING-DING (DOUBLE-DECKER ELECTRIC TROLLEY).  THERE ARE ALSO CITY BUSES, FERRIES, TAXIS, MINI-BUSES, AND A WHOLE LOTTA OTHER OPTIONS THAT MAKE MY 45 YEAR OLD BRAIN START TO SMOKE! 

The welcome mat is always out at the Toth home so want to come join me as I continue to explore? 

WATERFALL MOMENTS

OUR WATERFALL!

So, this is the view we see from the back of our home.  The dining room, Alex's room and my bathroom all have this view.  I call it OUR back yard even though I really share it with all of the Bel-Air complex and the 8 million people that live in Hong Kong!  Not too bad to look at and it turns out, not too tough to get to and climb.  The first week, after I arrived and was settling in, my new cell phone rang.  It was Alex.  He had gone out to take the dog for a walk.  He said, "Mom, look out the window!"  I wasn't sure what he wanted but he proceeded to tell me to go over and look out the dining room window.  "Do you see me?" I'm thinking...What?!  What are you doing?  Well, like the curious, brave, I-can-do-it soul that he is, he decided to stop looking at the waterfall and go climb it!  He managed to get himself to it with Aspen in tow and climb up and then call his Momma so she could see her son and her dog on top of "her" (I'm very possessive!) waterfall in Hong Kong.  

VERY COOL!

I appreciated this moment and Joe was there beside me to take it in and love that our son was "out back" climbing a waterfall and we were living on the 36th floor of our high rise watching him! 

This is also why I love being a Mom... because my children are raising ME well.  Alex is teaching me how to embrace this experience and be a true participant in life.  Mel too.  They are both in the midst of huge changes and new experiences and they rise up to meet every day with enthusiasm and a positive attitude.  If they can do it, I CAN DO IT!    



Same Food, Different Flavor

"Make yourself available for the experience."  Marianne Williamson

This is a definite experience and I'm trying!  So, as I write this, it is MY Friday afternoon.  Alex is at school.  Joe is off to Macau for the day, for work.  I am still trying to figure out how to be Tammy in Hong Kong!  Everything is different and I am the same.  Yet I am completely different.  Everything I once knew about myself has shifted. The friendships, the community, the job, the routines, the food, the transportation, the language, the customs, the places to shop, the weather, the seasons, and, brace yourself...the TV options.  Oh how I miss a good, bad TV show to get my mind off of things! LOL!

FOOD AND GROCERY SHOPPING

 

So I've been cooking but so far I am not impressed with myself.  I need to learn how to make food really yummy again.  So much is imported here that nothing has the same flavor.  Fruits and veggies, breads, and, as you see above, the proteins are a whole new experience here.  The meat in the grocery stores is super expensive but the other option is the street markets where you can find the above selection sitting out all day in 90 degree weather with 80% plus humidity.  Not brave enough for that yet. 

                                                                               

NAME THAT FRUIT...

When I first arrived, a beautiful, large fruit basket showed up from Joe's store and coworkers to officially welcome us to Hong Kong.  It was filled with amazing pears, plums, grapes, apples, grapefruit, and several things I wasn't familiar with, like the above.  Turns out it is a dragon fruit.  I wasn't sure how to eat it or prepare it so I cut into it and this is what you get:

It's good.  I wouldn't say I'm in love.  I think it would be great in a big fruit salad with other flavors to balance it.  Now, speaking of salad...not a big deal here.  I love a salad.  Green salad, fruit salad, spinach salad, pasta salad, etc.  Here...not so much.  They cook their vegetables and don't usually serve lettuce cold. 

THE GOOD NEWS AND MY BEST FIND SO FAR

WINE IN A GLASS, TO GO!

This makes me happy!  I went to get a bottle of water at a little food store and LOOK...They have white and almost-red wine in a glass with a sealed top on it, kinda like a pudding cup for grown-ups!  So, I figure I have many more wonderful discoveries ahead but the glass-o-wine is good enough for now!  Pam, Carla, and all my wine country ladies...come join me for a glass!  My treat!!

Welcome To Our Home

View of most of the Bel-Air Towers

I'm back and I survived my first outing alone!  I got lucky because I took a taxi to my destination so it was pretty easy.  You can download an app that will translate the address where you want to go for the taxi driver.  Did that.  Next hurdle, paying and tipping in HK$.  Did that!  After my appointment I had two hours to walk around central Honk Kong and start learning my way.  It went pretty well but I have NOT acclimated to the heat and humidity so I end up soaked!  I ended up in an huge luxury mall sitting in AC at the Starbucks and drinking a cold frappacino to recover.  So much for experiencing new things!  LOL!  Baby steps!

So I think I've got the picture thing figured out so I am sharing pics of our new residence area, Bel-Air.  It is outside of the really busy Central Hong Kong and allows us to see more green and nature plus a view of the South China Sea.  Alex has been able to ride his bike.  There are great walks for me and Aspen without fighting the city crowds.  Though it is like a suburb our complex is pretty huge with many  phases, towers, and floors (about 41-43 per building).  It has great facilities for all of us.  Indoor and outdoor pools, two gyms, spa, and great recreation for Alex.  Classmates live in and around here so he has already been down to play pool, foosball, and go to the movies at the nearby Cyberport where we also can grocery shop, dine, and attend events.  This is important because we are not going to have cars so walking and public transportation is always in the plan.  You may end up on a bus, then the MTR (Mass Transit Railway), and then finally a walk to your exact location.  I am learning to plan accordingly by learning bus/shuttle times, MTR stations, and understanding the time it will all take to get where I need to go, not to mention the condition I'll arrive in.  Joe says it takes a couple months but eventually when I walk around I won't be as soaked from the humidity.  The body adjusts.  I can only hope!!!!!!!!

Enjoy the pics of our new "home."

       Seaside park where I take Aspen for long walks.  Looking toward Bel-Air.

The park also sits next to the South China Sea so we can watch the ships.

"It's Like I Am In A Foreign Country!" ;-)

First let me just say...I know!  So far my record of blogging is not so great.  I set up myself to start blogging several weeks ago but the reality is my plate was too full and I needed to get Melanie off to college and prepare to move.  I knew if I set it up then, though, that I would be committed. I wanted to make sure once I got here I didn't drop the ball and not do it at all.  I knew once I arrived in HK I could take the time to write because the hardest parts were over.  I can even go back as I process the last few months and write about it as I fully realize and review all that has been.  Hopefully, it will be in combination with all that is yet to be and together we can experience this adventure!  I AM HERE...Hong Kong, China.  Yikes!  The title of this blog is tongue-in-cheek cause you know I like to laugh about it all, yet it is very honest.  Much like Dorothy said to Toto...I am not in Windsor, or even California, or even the United States anymore!

I arrived here just shy of one week ago and it has been a whirlwind of things to do to prepare for this day... my first day on my own. Joe had 3 relocation days off still, so he saved them for my arrival to help me settle in.  Thank heaven...there was my new residence to learn about because we live in a huge community of high rises called Bel-Air.  There are residence id's and access cards and learning how to get around and where you are allowed to walk the dog.   I needed several practice runs to just manage to be able to take the dog out for a walk without getting lost.  One of her favorite places to walk is a seaside park but it entails three seperate elevator rides down more than 36 floors and three seperate buildings to get there!

It just happened to work out that I arrived on a week when the smog was at its worst and even Alex had his Cross Country practices canceled because his coach said running with this air quality is equal to smoking a pack of cigarettes.  Oh, great!  I've put a picture up so you can have a sense of the smog. 
The smog is going to be one of my adjustment areas...but I also hope that since I arrived under the worst air quality it can only get better.  There are magnificent views to be seen so I anticipate them. 
I am figuring out how to post more pictures but I have just wasted a whole lotta time and got a whole lotta nothin'.  While I anticipate cooler weather and less smog, you can anticipate me learning how to show you all the pictures I am taking to share!  Hee Hee!

I have to stop here for now.  I have plenty more to say but I get to venture out on my own soon so there are other things to accomplish.  I have the house to finish moving into!!! I will leave you with the memory of the moment I arrived to see Joe and Alex after a two month seperation...After about 18 hours of traveling, 14 in the air, then waiting in line to go through immigration, followed by baggage reclaim and customs, I exited the secured area of the HK airport to see the most handsome guys ever with a huge bouquet of flowers and real hugs!  They have nurtured and supported me every moment since I've arrived and I frequently hear Joe ask, "Do you know how happy I am to have you here?"  So even when it is hard or I feel sad, it is still good.  I borrow a quote from one of my favorite songs by Joni Mitchell, "Well, something's lost but something's gained in living every day." I'm living and I'll talk to you soon.